I wish someone had told me your work doesn’t define you

The sense of one’s identity is an interesting concept to explore. At a time when introspection has been abundant, I have found myself considering what makes me, me. Society is quick to label people, whether out of convenience or necessity but I feel it adds little benefit to personal development. The easiest way to do this is to equate the work that someone does as who they are as a person.

When we enter the working world, it is easy to get lost in that perceived identity of who we are. The frustratingly mundane question of “So what do you do?” is asked with a surprising frequency. As if this line of questioning infers some all-encompassing description of someone that you can use to make a decision on who the person is and who they will always be.

Yes, this can be for the sake of small talk and yes, it does sometimes lead to more interesting tangents, yet I find it woefully inadequate a question to discover much about anyone. The problem with this is that after a while, people begin asking themselves this question believing the answer holds more sway than it does. We are not only our work.

As time goes by things get a little more complicated. There is nothing wrong with identifying in the work you do if this helps you be a better version of yourself. For others though, those who perhaps fulfill a variety of roles at work or struggle to accept the role they are currently in, it soon becomes apparent that it is harder to navigate society’s expectations of you.

Realising that the scope of human potential is as wide as it is deep can often be one of the greatest advantages for an individual in this modern world.

Escaping societal definitions of work can be difficult though, considering most people spend the majority of their adult lives in these roles. Taking a step back from that viewpoint can be challenging but if you take away that label, what is left? At our core, I think humans are infinitely complicated yet simple at the same time, and despite our best intentions we rarely fit into the boxes that society labels us in.

Remove the “identity” of your work and consider what remains – is that someone you are content to be or is there more? More action, more empathy, more understanding, more passion, more skills, all waiting to be discovered? 

As I sometimes remind myself in interesting times, where I am now is not where I have to stay. Who I am now will not always be who I am later.

How we define ourselves over time will probably change, which I think is an incredibly powerful tool at our disposal. We can remake ourselves, with time and with purpose.

“I wish someone had told me” is a series of posts that feed into our inquisitive nature at CN&CO. Each week we hear from someone in our network about something interesting or surprising that’s recently happened or occurred to them – or lessons they learnt. These blogs are a way to pay it forward and form part of CN&CO’s belief that the world can be a better place – and we all have a responsibility to make it so. This week’s post is by Rob Christian.